This post is to say that I’m retaking control of my life. It’s startling how things can spin out of reach when you are too depressed and stressed to pay attention. Last week I discovered that I had lost yet more weight, the culprit being that I’m a stress not-eater. It was the wake-up call I needed to start reclaiming my self. Now is when my stubbornness is a virtue.
Lots of thinking yesterday, and waking up this morning with the incredible sense of sun breaking through the clouds. To simultaneously dance at the edge of the universe, knowing that grace is an invitation to be beautiful, and to pause and stare out into the black with steely eyes, clenched fists, a stubborn heart, and to say with defiance into the void that threatens to devour all, “His grace is sufficient for me.”
I just showed up for my own life
And I’m standing here taking it in and it sure looks bright
I’m going to live my life inspired
Look for the holy in the common place
Open the windows and feel all that’s honest and real until I’m truly amazed
–“Just Showed Up For My Own Life,” Sara Groves